I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.