Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
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I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
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Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy