How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
