Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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