You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
