one might say we're banned from that church
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
