People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
