I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
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