I want to make a zoo with you.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
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You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
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The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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