I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Randomize