I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
