he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
