so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Farmville is her only friend.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
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