u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
