We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
This toilet bowl is my home.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize
