He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
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