It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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