what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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