why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Randomize