Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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