i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
