OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
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