May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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