She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
she pinky promised me she was 18
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
