Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
