i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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