My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
It happened again.
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.