who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Maybe he injected his testicle?
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Randomize
