its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Randomize
