Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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