Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
