im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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