I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Randomize