I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
