dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
