Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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