I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
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