I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Randomize
