she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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