And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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