I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Randomize
