Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
COCAINE IS GR8
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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