I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.