I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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