I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
