yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
