Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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