Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
