...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
