I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
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