just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
